and, we’re back

i could tell you that i took a little break to travel round and find the hot trends and clothes for you guys but that would be a total lie. i took a friggin vacation, or a man-cation as they’re called these days as me and me bros got together to discuss babes, bikes, beer and a million other subjects that don’t start with the letter B.

You know what else starts with the letter B? backside! dudes, you’re gonna have to deal with the fact that if you are in a semblance of shape at all, your ass is your second greatest asset. (your first is probably your shoulders, ok?) so you have to, absolutely must buy jeans that fit. because seriously, when you buy jeans that are too big and then cinch ‘em in with a belt to hold em up, you look like you’re wearing a diaper under your pants. that is the epitome of not sexy, dudes. it’s not even ok if you have a big ass.

so here’s the deal. you do not have to buy skin tight jeans – buy em with a little room in your thighs, that’s cool. in fact, that’s good. but do not buy jeans that hang loose around your ass. you may have to look at different brands, or different sizes. but dear god. let your jeans skim your ass and fit your waist well enough that when you put a belt on, the material of the jeans is not bunching up or folded over. this is not a good look for anyone.

so your mission, you have no choice but to accept it, is if you have ill fitting pants, replace them. now. with something that fits. if you’re single i guarantee you will get more dates (or more second dates) and if you’re attached, your wife / girlfriend / boyfriend will thank you. then tell them to thank me.

and now we return to our regularly scheduled shopping.